The LaBrie Stew

So, I’ve decided to wait on the graphic neck-slitting poem and go with one less graphic, but still having to do with pain. I’ve called it “The LaBrie Stew” because there’s a lot of pain and auto-immune diseases and what-not in my family. Here you go. It doesn’t rhyme, so don’t be disappointed Alex.

 

The LaBrie Stew (Otherwise known as The Imaginary Notion Society Calls Pain)

To sit cross-legged for too long

makes my hips feel weak.

To lie in a wrong position at night,

my back doth cry out in pain.

To land wrongly on one foot

shoots pain all up my leg,

but I shall state;

I am strong, everlong.

Though my body be weak,

my mind not hardly slipping,

I still have my life, and it is mine.

Enjoyable yet filled with pain,

Calm yet full of battles.

My body attacking itself for unnaparent reasons,

fertility thrown off-wack

due to thy chromosomes.

And what have I asked

Yet still to receive this?

Immune to almost nothing,

yet still killing off things;

my joints weak and weaker yet,

“Those are foreign bodies,”

Say my antibodies.

Medicine not nearly reprieve,

Pain temporarily away,

and even though I look just peachy,

my internal battles rage on and on and on.

Grim is not my normal mood,

This poem sounds it though,

but doth thou know this pain of which I speak to you now?

With every contraction and expansion of heart,

I can feel it in my bones

the pain of which almost unbearable,

yet I remain unfazed.

Because, as I said,

I am strong, everlong.

So block it out as I do,

and you’ll find to your surprise,

that you are normal,

and pain just recent; a memory,

As tho faded into black.

Like still-frame pictures

worn down by time and sun.

But remember that you are strong of mind,

your body only a house,

and when you move,

you move with pride

for you are

Strong.

Strong like many and army,

like shining bars of gold,

You shine and glisten like all the stars,

and stronger you become.

You trek through all the jungles,

past every waterfall,

and even when you wake up,

you know no greater happiness

than that free of pain

along with family.

Because, one last time,

you

are

Strong,

Ever long.

 

–Lindsey LaBrie

LinLaB7

 

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5 Comments

  1. I did not really like this… I must say that dark styles do not seam to be your strong suit. It was just not that great of a poem. The end of it was ok but I believe that is because you are good at positive poems. The idea behind it was good but it kind of re-listed the point over and over again. I did just did not enjoy it, but that might be me. If other people enjoyed it then I am wrong and sorry. But I just did not really enjoy this one and thought I would say.

    P.S – Gold is actually a really soft metal, softer than lead! A gold bar can be bent in your hands if it meets the international gold standard (99.9%).

  2. I suppose you are not around pain on a frequent basis. I wrote that poem, un-rhyming and all, because I felt a need to express how people in my life feel every day. They wake up feeling pain, go through the day feeling pain, and go to bed not any better. They take meds, but they don’t really seem to dull the pain at all. The only time they don’t feel pain is when they are dreaming. And having a strong will to go on encourages them to live another day. Their lives are filled with pain, so they fight it and are strong, and become emotionally strong though physically weak. The theme of my poem is not dark, the message is that even though you feel terrible, you are strong and no one can tell you differently. I re-iterated the line, “You are strong, everlong.” for that reason. Maybe now you see my purpose for writing. What you perceive as dark, I perceive as reality.

    • What do you count as pain? On my mothers side of the family cancer is very common. All my life people who I know and love die. The have tumors and cyst removed without Anastassia because the are under chemotherapy so their bodys are weak and the Anastasia could stop their heart. On My dad’s side of the family depression is very common and I have to watch as my loved ones drink themselves to death or blow their brains out. I know how you feel with pain. I was not trying to insult you I was just trying to say that the poem needed work.

      P.S. – I was saying dark as in the genre of the poem. It is talking about pain and other unpleasantries.

      P.P.S – I was not saying the idea pehind the poem was bad. Just that the poem itself need work. If you look at what I said it’s right there “The idea behind it was good”. I enjoy poems like this and their style because they talk about what most people are to afraid to, death. I just thought that this one need a little work. It was repedative.

      • That does make sense and it could be implemented but it works best on rhyming poems. On rhyming poems repetition helps hold the poem together and restates the main point of the poem. Your poem repeats in an indirect way, which could work but it just doesn’t. Again I am not trying to say the idea behind the poem is bad. It was a good idea to choose something personal to talk about in a poem as deep as this. It just didn’t do a good job at re-listing the main point of the poem in a non-repetitive way. If you only just hinted at the topic then it would have repeated also, but you almost re-list the point over and over again. I just thought it was a little too repetitive. I understand why you want it to do that now, but it still repeats to such a degree that it gets almost annoying. I like the idea but kind of wish it listed the point subtlety.

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